{"id":2603,"date":"2023-05-18T14:12:31","date_gmt":"2023-05-18T18:12:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.spanglishvoces.com\/?p=2603"},"modified":"2023-05-18T14:18:15","modified_gmt":"2023-05-18T18:18:15","slug":"just-another-anxiety-poem","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.spanglishvoces.com\/index.php\/2023\/05\/18\/just-another-anxiety-poem\/","title":{"rendered":"Just Another Anxiety Poem"},"content":{"rendered":"

Anxiety\u00a0is a dysfunctional musical ensemble;<\/span><\/p>\n

My sense of control,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

the conductor.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

My melodic chorus\u00a0of\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m fine,\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

accompanied,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

with a winning smile,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

to stop\u00a0your worried questions,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

and concerned stares.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Every 5 minutes\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

I touch each finger\u00a0to my thumb:\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

1 2 3 4.\u00a0 1 2 3 4,<\/span><\/p>\n

following that same rhythm, \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

and I can\u2019t change the pace.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I notice\u00a0the sound\u00a0of my breathing,<\/span><\/p>\n

making me cower\u00a0from human contact.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

My heartbeat\u00a0must sound\u00a0out of tune.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

My mind races\u00a0in conversations,<\/span><\/p>\n

There\u2019s a cacophony\u00a0of secret warnings,<\/span><\/p>\n

under every phrase\u00a0I utter.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

My speech\u00a0must sound off-pitch.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Uncertainty crosses your face,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Damn!\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

It\u2019s time to flash that fake ass smile again.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cAm I convincing enough for you?\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Is my jaw too tightly clenched?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Is my foot tapping too loud?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Am I sweating too much?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Did you hear my heart\u00a0skip a beat?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Then the time comes<\/span><\/p>\n

when my internal questions fade,<\/span><\/p>\n

my fists open,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

revealing the creases in my palms,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

and I will release a long sigh.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The music will then slow,\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

and the controlled illusion will shatter.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

\"\"Jasmine Gonzalez\u00a0is from New York City. Writing poetry is how she reclaims the power over
\nthe aspects of her mental health that can spin out of control. Her poetry has been published in
\nLehman\u2019s literary magazine, Obscura and in La Libreta for Women in Creative Rebellion.
\nBefore graduating from Lehman College, she completed a senior thesis that focused on
\nNuyorican women writers and their impact on the literary world. Currently, she works as a
\nvolunteer editorial assistant for Walking in Other People\u2019s Shoes where she helps elevate the
\nvoices of women of color. Jasmine also works as a part-time Programs Assistant at the
\nNuyorican Poets Caf\u00e9. In the future, she hopes to publish more of her own writing to further help
\nthe agenda of giving voices to marginalized writers.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Anxiety\u00a0is a dysfunctional musical ensemble; My sense of control,\u00a0 the conductor.\u00a0   My melodic chorus\u00a0of\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m fine,\u201d accompanied,\u00a0 with a winning smile,\u00a0 to stop\u00a0your worried questions,\u00a0 and concerned stares.\u00a0   Every 5 minutes\u00a0 I touch each finger\u00a0to my thumb:\u00a0 1 2 3 4.\u00a0 1 2 3 4, following that same rhythm, \u00a0 and I can\u2019t […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":63,"featured_media":2605,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[78,883],"tags":[881,882,851,879,205,186,184],"yoast_head":"\nJust Another Anxiety Poem - Spanglish Voces Magazine<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.spanglishvoces.com\/index.php\/2023\/05\/18\/just-another-anxiety-poem\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Just Another Anxiety Poem - Spanglish Voces Magazine\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Anxiety\u00a0is a dysfunctional musical ensemble; 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